Revenge Clip of the Day

I just got back from the auto repair dealer where I met with the insurers to talk about fixing my car. They gave me an estimate of the cost and timeframe it'd take to fix my car. Let's just say that I'm glad I have insurance to repair the vandalism, which they called "extensive."

Regardless, I will still hunt down these thugs. It may involve some interrogation similar to how my hero Jack Bauer deals with things.

Baseball Players Pointing to the Sky

"Baseball Players Pointing to the Sky"

This was the phrase that I put into Google out of curiosity. Yes, a slow day at work. What's more amazing is the number one result, which is this USA Today Article about this phenomenon. Check it out.

Pointing: It isn't just for pop-ups anymore

As observed by Audrey last week, we at 1524sf pretty much do this for any occasion, like opening a can of chili, the second we get off of work, baseball games, opening a Miller High Life, and so on. I think you should too.

You Messed with an O.G.

"Revenge is a dish best served cold."

That is quote from one of my favorite movies of all time, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.

I immediately thought about these words yesterday afternoon after discovering that someone had keyed my car on all four sides. The major damage was on the front hood and truck hood where the assholes keyed in two curse words.

Now, I'm usually a peaceful guy and I really don't turn to violence when I'm angry. I really don't think violence is the answer to most things. However, I am going to the other side on this issue.

My main goal in my remaining time here is to find these hooligans and bring them to justice by any means necessary. I will be the poster child to BAMN. Yes, I am talking about Street Justice. As Mayor to SF, I will launch sweeping raids to ensure that no corner is left unguarded. I will use all my resources to bring these people to justice. Besides paving the roads and my other campaign promises, I am now officially declaring that I will upgrade my "Take back the Loin" promise to "Take back the streets."

You, my hoodlums, have officially pissed me off. Prepare to meet your end. You're messing with an O.G.

The chase may look like this:




More seriously though... Who the hell keys cars these days? That's just idiotic.

Foreshadowing

Today I taught my final class for Junior Achievement (more on this later on the Realm), but I thought I'd share a funny dialog from today's class:

Rohit: If you want a skate park, y'all should ask Gavin. I'm not going to help build you one. (One of our lessons dealt with electing a mayor who campaigned on building a skatepark—c'mon, this is second grade.)

Student 1: Who's Gavin?

Student 2: He's the mayor, stupid!

Student 1: Oh, I thought he was dead.

Rohit: He'll be dead in the water once my roommate announces his candidacy.

Class: What?!

Rohit: Nevermind

Life on the Edge

This morning, I drove to work. Now, my commute is usually about 45 minutes, especially given the congestion at the Fell/Octavia intersection and the bridge traffic. However, probably due to my above-normal aggressive driving today, I was flying by all the cars and was already on the East Bay side of the Bay Bridge within 20 minutes. Crazy, eh? Well, not as crazy as driving over the newly reconstructed I-580 connector.

In case you didn't hear, a portion of the highway collapsed a few weeks ago during a truck accident. The contractors cleaned out the section and replaced the collapsed section not days, but WEEKS in advance. Not to knock on them, but isn't that a bit too fast? Did someone test the highway? When it reopened, I thought about how I'll let a few thousand cars test the connector before I went ahead and drove on it.

Of course, my vision of trying it a few weeks from now went out the window as I suddenly realized that I was heading up the I-580 ramp. My pulse accelerated. I thought about whether i should accelerate just in case the portion collapsed again.... I mean, if they did it in "Speed" with a bus, I'm sure my Corolla can handle a little jump. I saw the 165-foot stretch of new concrete. It seemed to stretch into eternity.

But before I knew it, I was already past it and on the 580. I saw the familiar sights from the highway, namely the Best Buy in Emeryville. I shrugged and continued on my journey. I knew it was going to be a good day.

What's Cooler Than Cool? Ice Cold!

Melinda visited my class yesterday and asked a student to tell her a secret about me.

The student said, "Mr. Sharp is mean! His heart is made out of ice!" To which Melinda responded, "That's not a secret. Everyone knows that."

What have I become? I'm turning into Rohit.

PS. Melinda says, "Actually, Rohit likes sea otters. You're WORSE than Rohit."

Anything Less Would Be Uncivilized

I don't think my students know what deodorant is...

Student: Mr. Sharp, are you wearing cologne?
Me: No, of course not.
Student: Oh, you smell really nice today.
Me: Thanks! (It's rare that a student says something nice about me). I'm not wearing cologne, but I am wearing deodorant.
The Entire Class: EEEEWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (In the loud, annoying way that only a class of 5th graders could do).

WTF!?

Either my class doesn't know what deodorant is (scary thought), or they were playing a mean mean joke on me. And yes, I did write mean twice on purpose - that's how mean it was.